It’s puh-tay-toh to both of us but I say tuh-may-toh and she says tuh-mah-toh. She says the way I say “niche” is what someone has if they are scratching. And the way I say aunt is a picnic insect to be squashed. We have discovered so many words and meanings proving that the language of English is really British, Scottish, Welsh, Irish, American, Australian, and so many others. And within American boundaries, I know there are accents, dialects and differences galore (just like cockney, yorkshire, highland, etc.). I was “complimented” the other day by someone who didn’t believe I was American because my accent was too “soft” but I also wasn’t British because I didn’t say the right words!. Perhaps my Midwest twang has been replaced by some background frenchiness? I now have enough French under my belt to speak a few key phrases very quickly and proficiently. The problem is that the locals respond in the same way and I feel like an idiot when I say I speak only a tiny bit of French after they’ve just answered me for five minutes. But I digress…some other fun English ones…paper towels are kitchen roll. Stovetop burners are hobs. You can be piqued but not peaked. You’re really tired if you’re “knackered”. Of course, no one uses the word bathroom…it’s toilette or loo…and restroom or ladies room would meet with blank stares. A taco is really more like a gyro, a sandwich is really more like a sub, a muffin is really more like a cake, and a bagel is anything but a bagel! Oops, digressed again. And by the way, anyone with a “wipe off fingerprints” fetish should not buy a touchscreen tablet computer. Three “streaks” and I’m out!